Alone (adj.) – 1. Being apart from others; solitary.
2. Being without anyone or anything else; only
Lonely (adj.) – 1. Without companions; lone
2. Dejected by the awareness of being alone
(definitions taken from The Free Dictionary)
I began to think about this when a guy friend at work suggested I get a new boyfriend.
I was all but disgusted by the suggestion.
I’ve been enjoying my freedom and independence so much since the aftermath of the-breakup-that-took-way-too-long-to-happen.
My coworker mentioned something about me wanting to be lonely and that he couldn’t understand why.
After this, I firmly corrected him.
“I am alone,” I say. “But never lonely.”
He was thinking of the situation in overly simplistic terms, a flaw that unfortunately ails most men. He deduced, logically yet incorrectly, that if I didn’t have someone in my life then it could only follow that I was lonely.
I broke it down to him like this.
Loneliness occurs when you feel the absence of Other.
Aloneness occurs when you feel the presence of Self.
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I’m alone right now on the toilet and I’m feeling the presence of myself just fine (and smelling it too lmao). A friend of mine has something like this on her xanga. She said lonley is a word to describe the pain of being alone and solitude is a word to describe the joys of being alone. Actually I think she was quoting somebody.
The guy’s logic was funny for sure. If someone has a significant other, they can still feel lonely or alone. Not all relationships are happy.
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