Fast forward to a couple years down the road when I myself finally lost my virginity. I say finally because even though I was still on the young side, all my peers had been doing it for years. I suppose I was one of the lucky ones. He was a great guy, my first real love and we had a good relationship. But even through the dizzying feelings of first love and finally “becoming a woman,” I felt this persistent sense of impending doom.
I’d had sex.
I wasn’t married, hell, I was still a minor.
I was going to Hell now for sure.
While blossoming into a woman, a young sexual being, I felt great. Yes, there were the fears and insecurities that come with starting to have sex (and when you become a little more seasoned you realize that those feelings are there no matter how many times you do it) but in all, it was a tremendously joyous experience and a period of awakening for me.
The church tells you that you can’t have sex and have God, that you can’t be spiritual and be sexual. The two seem to be forever mutually exclusive. The exception is if you are married, and even then, there are still many who believe that sex exists solely for procreation and that birth control is unholy. God forbid you have fun while you have sex and when you do, you’d better be married and producing offspring.
Well, I call shenanigans on that rhetoric.
You can read the rest of my article “In Defense of The Unchaste”, here .
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